Why do u believe in God?

The most recent issue of Daily Bread has this little article pamphlet about
"Wisdom of Motives".

(the online version is available at this link):
http://www.rbc.org/bible-study/been-thinking-about/2008/04/01/column.aspx

After reading that article, I found myself asking: "Why do I believe in God? Is there a motive behind my Faith in God? Do I seek God for my own selfish reasons?"

Do I believe in God because if I do not I go to hell and If I believe I go to heaven? Did God promise I'll have a good life free of problems and be successful in life? Who is the Lord of my life? Am I the Lord of my own life, and treating God as a means to solve my problems, Seeking Him only in times of deep trouble and then chucking Him aside when things go fine?

Do I see my relationship with God as something I can stand to gain, then I will believe God? What if I cannot gain anything from God? Will I still recognise Him as the God who created all of the universe? Preacher Rf asked a hypothetical question:" If today God decided that if you believe Him, you will not get any salvation, nor go to heaven. Will you still believe in Him, and recognise He is God?"

Our motives speak for alot of things we do: a means to an end.

we study hard so as to get good results
we work hard so we can earn money
we do this this this..... so to get that that that....

Well.., is Christianity like that?? Do we as christians believe God only because we stand to gain something? We tend to forget one thing: God did not have to/ or obliged to save us from our sins. He did not have to come to the world and endure hardship, and die on the cross for us. Yet He did. He did not have to suffer for our sakes but He did.

The only Motive behind what God did was LOVE for us, even when we do not know about His love. Because when you love someone, you will want the best for the person. And when you love someone you don't need to earn the person's permission to love him/her. Just like parents will love their children, its not trying to gain someone's approval.

Here's a verse from Revelations 2:1-4

1"To the angel[a] of the church in Ephesus write:
These are the words of him who holds the seven stars in his right hand and walks among the seven golden lampstands: 2 I know your deeds, your hard work and your perseverance. I know that you cannot tolerate wicked men, that you have tested those who claim to be apostles but are not, and have found them false. 3 You have persevered and have endured hardships for my name, and have not grown weary. 4 Yet I hold this against you: You have forsaken your first love.

The church of Ephesus was a blessed church by God, they were adept in their knowledge of God. They had gifts of God but yet, they have forsaken their first love: GOD.

I hope I will not forget that I Believe in God because It was my heart's response to knowing God's Love for me. It is the heart's response to want to know God and His love for others.

Finally a good school day... YAY!

Snoozed for like 45minutes before I even woked up today... BUT!!! Major improvement that I'm finally able to wake up on time by myself. XD

It has really been a long time since I'm able to enjoy my journey to school in a relaxed mood, watching the oncoming traffic, observing people... well Its just another normal day, isn't it?

As compared to the past 2 weeks when I've been rushing to school as I'm always late T.T, I'm finally able to make school in time and enjoying it. Having a time at the start of the day to reflect about God's grace in my life has really been good.

A lot of things are irreversible in life.. and certainly time is one of them, and yet each time I have a chance to quietly look back into life, God is the only one who hasn't changed. And He has never changed from since the beginning of time, and will not change for the future to come.

People come and go, words are said and forgotten, yet, there is someone here who hasn't changed quite a bit. His words will hold forever for He is God of my life and each and everyone of ours. So much has changed in me ever since I started walking this journey with Him, and as I learnt more about Him, I realise how foolish I had led my life in the past. But God is patient, and He always shows me the way and sometimes stubborness just means learning it the hard way.

Sometimes I seem to miss the point of my life: which is supposed to be God. Rushing to school, rushing to complete tutorials, assignments, rushing to eat during lunch breaks.

I miss the days so carefree in some times of my life I can just relax, take a step out of life and reflect upon Him and wonder: hahaha... hmm Lord I wonder why I do some of the things I do. Indeed, I had much joy coming to school today. Not because I woke on time, not because I was finally not late for lessons, not because I finally did revision. But because of Him, who granted yet a fresh day in my life I can renew my heart in Him.

Take my heart
hold my hands
open my eyes
to see Your work in my life

Unsure of myself

A series of events unfolded during the last week so quickly it caught me off guard.
Late problems, sleeping disorders (i sleep 12hrs + daily) and I have trouble motivating myself for studies and life.

That hasn't happened for a long time, not at least during my darkest days when i received Christ when i told GOD: God.. why is my life in such a mess. If you would help me to change everything over I will follow You

Today I'm unsure.. waking up with an unusual fatigue, and doubts about whether I'm really Christian at times. I'm struck: can i love as God does so ever unconditionally? Do i know whats loving others? Am I responsible enough in life? Am I doing enough? Am I....!!! What's wrong with me?? Am i being too complacent and in comfort zone in my walk with God? Am I even walking right with You?

What if? a lot of uncertainty is filling my mind and I have absolutely no answers to. I just hope God will set things right again. I can only rely on Him now.

forgetfulness

I'm not a very detailed person in life, as such I miss out on a lot of important details, or at least those that do not seem important enough to me. This is a niggling problem as I forget things very often nowadays. As the hectic lifestyle of a undergraduate get to me, I even forget I'm supposed to meet my church committee members!

I have found a way to counter that, and that is to keep a schedule book, which is really tough for me as I do not have a habit of planning nor organising my stuff.. but well now I have to.

I realised.. its not just minor details I forget at times. At many points in life, I will also simply forget God's presence in my life, even though He is always around. Why do i say that? Sometimes when faced with a problem, we always seek "practical help" instead of praying to God about it.

I also have a bad habit of worrying... = pessimistic/ negative mindset. I will always think about the future and conclude: "Oh no! this is gonna be so bad." In essence, I forgot to look back in my life and look at how God has indeed brought me through each and every situation I thought I will never be able to pull through, do things I never think I am capable of.

Some may say to me:" hey, where's your self-confidence man?? u need some courage and positive thinking!"

After thinking for a long while and reflecting my problems to God, I found that it hinges on something. Or rather, my self-confidence is lost because many a times I forgot I am in good hands when I'm in God's hands. I try to combat my problems looking to solve them but always fail because the central issue here is that I lost focus with God. Whenever faced with a brand new challenge in life, i flinch because of my insecurities before God.

I'm just not able to leave EVERYTHING 100% to Him, even when I know It will be in good hands. Much less say surender things to God in a situation where I'm so caught up in life and God seems distant, and far.

I remember Jesus talking about the parable of a farmer sowing seeds in different grounds. (there are a few types)
First seeds sown on hard ground became bird food. The second type fell into rocky soil and the roots couldn't grow strong so when winds came, the seedling was uprooted. I belong to the third case: I'm growing up in a weedy soil with all the weeds, suffocating in between so not growing well.

As i think about it, yea.. if there is something I just need to remember that will be: God's grace in my life. I really need to be reminded of how precious His grace had been, is now and is going to be in the future. I shall cast all worries on Him for He cares for me, and NOT forget He is my Lord of my life.

Father, help me remember You are my God. Thank You for saving me and being the Lord of my life.

time to focus back to reading study notes T.T

Here it goes again~~

Its a new year (academic) and hopes are brimming. Especially so after Freshmen Orientation Camp. Its a time I'm actually looking forward to seeing fellow crusaders and fellow brothers and sisters in Christ again on campus, and of course my fun-loving fellowship on weekends in church. :D

It is my prayer that God allows Christians on campus to see that they are on campus for a reason (other than study of course). After reflecting a bit, I think I might have gone overboard with my "invitations" to my church Uni undergraduates while asking them to try joining a Christian group on campus, as some people appear to be offended.

This has never been what I'm trying to do. I WOULD RATHER YOU BE WALKING CLOSE WITH GOD THROUHOUT YOUR 4 YEARS IN UNIVERSITY AND FOR YOUR LIFETIME THAN JOINING CAMPUS CRUSADE. I was merely sharing about how I benefitted from campus crusade because I came to know God so much more. If I offended anyone in the process I'm truly sorry. Its ultimately God that determines your own paths, and of course your own decisions do as God gave us a choice.

I'm not here to hard sell Campus Crusade, and certainly not Christianity. I merely want you to think about something deeper: Are you just gonna study through your 4 years of university on campus? Do you just walk with God on Saturdays and Sundays? I admit sometimes I'm just not good with words and not tactful enough.. its something I'm constantly learning and moving towards to so ya..

Yes you may be serving fervently in church. No problem with that as I'm in no position to pass judgement on you. It's your choice. Case closed :) I just hope u and I are walking close with God and not be argueing whether you and I should take up any ministry on campus.

As I collect back the pieces of the past.. I now live with the hope that I'm in Good hands. God, I'm ready for whatever You have planned for me ahead. Lead me as You know me best.

Just before the Semester starts, I pray sincerely for:
1) God to let people see their lives purpose
2) Bless the School admist all the H1N1 frenzy
3) Pray for better management to balance School and ministry
4) My family's health and salvation

Holidays is declared : OVER

Ntu Campus Crusade FOC 2009

Thoughts and feelings about FOC:

Being the first time to serve in a ad hoc project like the FOC is not an easy task for most of our committee members and I’m glad that we handled it quite well this time. Looking for Main committee members started way back in March. However, the main committee was only officially formed after May, and we had a tight schedule to keep with.

Not knowing what to expect, and not having participated in any of camp organizing committees in church, this was truly the first time. There were times where I was scared, because a lot of crusaders were telling me how important FOC was: it determines whether people stay on in Crusade or not. And so I was quite obsessed in a sense… how to make them stay in Crusade?

Thank God He changed that perspective to His own one. It is more important for a Christian, whether he/she joins Campus Crusade is not the point. The whole point is, whether the FOC can allow them to commit their whole lives to God and only God alone. And I was very glad that after FOC, hearing a lot of sharing about how God worked through those who came for the camp, I was very encouraged that God has led our committee and whole FOC this way.

Personally, I have a weak faith and there are many a times I will succumb to fears and insecurities. Prioritizing was also a tough lesson for me, because I have a tendency to do things in the spur of the moment, and most likely following what I want to do. Thus I had to force myself at times to do the right things at the right time. Looking back, and remembering the days in which FOC was conducted, we had a few hiccup moments, but thankfully we handled them well. And it’s a scary situation when all people seem to know you and not the other way around.. ahhhhh help!

I would like to take this opportunity to thank each and everyone of the Main committee members: ALL of You Have done WELL!!

Thank you Yue Qi, for being committed to the committee as PROGRAMS COORDINATOR even though you had to juggle work commitments, and tasks handled to you with unclear instructions(woops hahas). I thought you did well coordinating the worship teams and communicating the ideas our committee had in mind about the worship sessions. You have a cheerful character and have definitely brought joy to our committee.

Thank you Ming Shi, for being the GAMES COORDINATOR! You have done well organizing your subcomm and I know games is a very taxing part of any camps because while the rest of the camp is enjoying their hearts out, you and your subcomm members are sweating and working at preparing the games stations or doing preparations. The games on the FOC received much applause as I chatted with various Seniors and freshmen alike. I’m sure everyone of us enjoyed the games!

Thank you Wee Kian, for being the LOGISTICS COORDINATOR! Despite not having a subcomm you have handled the logistics well and most of the time you are in a “one-man show” taking care of everything that needs to be transported to food, and to travelling to-and-fro from your house to NTU for bookings of venues and checking out of equipments. You are a very responsible servant of Christ and I do learn a lot working with you. My coursemate in CBC as well!! Looking forward to seeing you back in DG too as school starts.

Thank you Rachel, for being the ADMIN COORDINATOR, I’m sorry I still remember telling you when you took up the post that Admin should be very relaxed post.. in fact! Its not! With all the late sign-ups and getting the booklets and packages sorted out to having extra late nights out with other FOC plannings. Rachel you have done a good job! The commitment you show flows out and I can see that God has blessed you richly with a lot of skills to serve Him. May you continue to shine for Him.

Thank you Julian, for being the SENIOR ADVISOR on our team. Your experience and sharings of God’s word definitely adds balance to our team. Juggling church commitments and work commitments is not an easy task. And I’m forever amazed about how you handle your life despite the difficulties. It is very encouraging to see you serve the Lord so fervently. You are indeed blessed with skills that God can make use of for His purpose. See you back in school!

Thank you Shushyan, for believing in me that I could be a Camp IC when I thought not. I’m sure you must have been quite worried cause I keep being late and being not as organized about the work. I’m glad to have accepted the offer that day. Because I think God wants me to learn to trust in Him. I have grown to love praying to Him because I always see you pray your heart out to Him. Thank you for doing the job that I have overlooked and which was important. It must have been busy for you as there are staff retreats, SMC, FOC, recruitment all coming at you at a go.

And finally I want to give thanks to our Father God in Heaven, who made everything possible, filling in whatever we have not done enough, but used all that we have done for His purpose, and thank Him for not forsaking me despite me having almost backslided even before taking up the role of Camp IC. If He did not lead me back, there and then, Chin Wee would probably have left Campus Crusade, and maybe even Christianity and God. I want to trust in You to lead my life, for You are faithful and you know my heart and even myself better than I do.

May all glory be to our Father in Heaven.